Since we are now 20% of the way through the season (does that make it a reasonable sample size? I never know) I thought it was a good time to provide a progress report on the Cubs.
Soriano -- I give him a B+. I'd like to see a few more stolen bases, but he's hitting well and playing every day which is berry berry good. He has more assists than Soto has homers. His .331 obp is pretty good for him.
Theriot -- also a B+. .366 obp and 5 homers. Has four errors which keeps him from getting a better grade, but 7 steals is decent.
Fukudome -- have to give the guy an A. He's been good.
DLee, GSoto, MBadly, AAmiles -- all get the YoSuSoFa award. (that means "You Suck So Far.")
Aramis -- would be a good grade if he could play; at least he shouldn't be tired come September this year.
Hoffpauir -- B-; which isn't so bad. With more playing time and some adjustments, he'll hit.
Reed Johnson -- C-
Fontenot -- C-; why did he disappear when the season started? Needs to cut down on that swing and quit trying to jack everything out of the park. Who does he think he is? Ryan Theriot?
Dempster -- C -- was he worth $48M? Would you have rather had Derrek Lowe for the same $
Zambrano -- B -- looks okay so far; hopefully can pitch the rest of the way
Lilly -- B+ -- finds a way to win.
Harden -- B+ -- Stay healthy, Rich.
Marshall -- C -- needs to step it up to stay in the rotation.
Patton, Cotts -- YoSuSoFa
Marmol -- up and down. I give him a C for inconsistancy
Gregg -- B- at least he's 6 for 7 in saves.
Guzman -- B- -- looking better every time out
Heilman -- I'd have given him a B two weeks ago, but now it's a C (partially due to overuse.)
King Coffee Bean -- D+ for pushing caffeine to children
That's the progress report as I see it. We can be much better, which is good news considering we're still near the top of our division. When we start to click, it should be all good.
Need to sweep the Padres today!
JS
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14 comments:
Apparently the word pussy is off limits at VFTB. What a buncha jebus freaks and whiners over there. And of course, Dave has to say that he was "offended."
Pussies.
I am going to post this at VFTB, let's see what word is allowed.
"Dave is a pussy shitbag douchebag dimwit teabaggin asswipe shithead dumbass argumentative cocksucker.
Joe, could you edit which word(s) are acceptable. Thanks."
He'll edit it to read
Dave is a wit.
Cubs did sweep today!
The grades are pretty much on the money, but I think Marshall has been better than a C. And I swear Milkit is steadily climbing toward respectability.
Dave actually had a post this am without solely denigrating another post, personal growth? or More likely still a douchebag.
I've gotta admit, when the chick said she was offended, I thought it must have been the word craptastic. I didn't even see "pussy" when I was looking back for offensive words.
These guys really need to get out and listen to how the English language is actually spoken.
At least Joe didn't censor out the word pussy. It's just commentors who are taking you to task.
True...
Now had Mojo substituted the words.."glistening vaginal folds"...I suspect the comments would have slowed to a crawl. It's hard to type with one hand.
I have to say this: I'm offended at the term "gray box"
And what about when DLee snatches away a base hit? Or Theriot "muffs" one at short?
How about pitchers who toe the mound? Batters getting in and out of the box? Eager Beavers getting to the park early?
Okay. Terms like "beef curtains" and "meat wallet" might be slightly offensive to some. Even "nappy dugout" is marginal. But "Cha Cha" is kind of cute. So is Coochie. And Hooha.
But none of them mean pussy the way the Captain meant it in his comment. I wonder what kind of bearded clam took offense? What flange? I bet she's got a moose knuckle to beat all.
Just in case KGB Joe edits my posts here they are:
James Bond says:
May 14, 2009 at 11:50 pm
I didn’t find Pussy Galore offensive until she tried to choke me to death in Gold Finger, or was it Diamonds are Forever. I just don’t see what all the fuss is about Mrs Pussy. I think everyone just needs to clit over it.
Davdadouche says:
May 15, 2009 at 12:00 am
Has anyone here ever spent some time in a dugout? Teammates use profanity with eachother all the time, it is part of the dugout banter, the commaraderie of it all. You really aren’t accepted as a teammate until someone calls you a cocksucker, pussy or someother name which would be offensive in the general public or on VFTB.
So in an effort to get along I would like to accept all of you douchebags as my teammates.
tomorrow I will apolgize for writing "thank christ"
What? No love for "beef curtains?"
Is this thing on?
My posts made in alias by James Bond and davdadouch have been deemed unacceptable.
I am done with VFTB, Dave is an argumentative bitch and they are politically correct whiners who need to control everyone speech. Badmojo's use of the word pussy in describing free agents, not calling someone a pussy mind you, should not be offensive to normal baseball fans. "That word offends me". Fuck them. I am going to send Wendel Kim and Joe Pepitone over to their house so they can hear some real profanity.
At least he left them up -- James B and Dave LaDouche stand.
No love for Meat Wallet?
Hello?
Personally I think it's a load of fun to try and push the buttons of the intolerant.
And Joe is letting a lot more go by the censor lately.
There would have been a lot more comments about pussy galore, if any of those guys had any "first hand" experience with it.
now the comments have turned to: "what happened? This used to be such a nice, friendly blog" Matt (AKA Banana#2) is back today with his mouth full of Dave's cock as usual. He plays on a real baseball team...I assume with mitts and everything. I don't really know these guys, but I feel like I have known enough guys like them to wonder who let them out of the locker freshman year. Strat-o-matic baseball and playstation dorks that would not know the difference between a cut fastball and a sinker. Plus, they don't think Sherm is funny, which we all know, he is.
I actually liked the baseball euphimisms better...batters getting in and out of the box. I will try to sneak in eager beavers getting to the ball park early, in case the crowd is larger than at a division 4 cross country meet...
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